catchall; gideon

[toyska]

I want you to know that on my journey to find a shitpost I learned what "pumpkin pounder" means

Comments

[cavaliered]

[ok but he's right though]

To test them out, yeah. You never know when one of them might be something useful.

[toyska]

[Damn... Gideon's dumber braver than he is... now he's insecure... "pixi this isn't how the effect works" it is now]

Well, are they?

[cavaliered]

[no that's exactly how it works i've just decided]

Nope. [lol] The one that makes you just do whatever you want is fun though.

[toyska]

[he has no idea what this means but he will take her word for it]

Well, you might as well try the new ones while we're here, right?

[cavaliered]

Might as well. If we know what they do, we won't be fucking useless during trial.

[toyska]

Haha, that's a good point.

[Childe is already useless during trial but he's still pro-efficiency.]

What are you thinking? [WHAT DRINK WILL SHE CHOOSE...]

[cavaliered]

I guess whichever one smells the least like rotting fruit. [nyeh she still doesn't like the taste of alcohol.]

The one with lemon in it sounds good? What do you think Health of Mind implies?

[toyska]

[ :megaphone: WEAK]

That's what happens when you keep drinking cocktails! [Why do that when you can drink HARD LIQUOR that tastes like GASOLINE]

Maybe it makes you smarter? [Unlikely] Or it turns you into a nun. [More likely, for the stupidity of it]

[cavaliered]

I'm already a nun, technically.

[technically.] Anyway, shut the fuck up, if I have to drink, I'm not going to drink something that tastes like the inside of a shuttle engine.

[toyska]

Then it'll have no effect, so it's a win, right?

[She absolutely does not count as a nun. But he laughs]

Suit yourself, but no one was ever convinced they were in love with someone else because they had a glass of fire-water.

[...He stops and thinks about drunk people for a second. Actually,,]

...Okay, maybe that was a bad example.

[cavaliered]

That is a supremely bad example. [lmao]

Okay. Which one of these suckers do you want? [knocking on the counter... or whatever it is. i'm too lazy to look.

oh, also - there's something moving in gideon's hood of her cloak.]

[toyska]

[STOP listen he hasn't been that drunk probably ever tbh. And normally he would not drink anything besides the beer at all, but it's insecurity week so I've decided he will do it this time. Still--]

Shouldn't we take turns? [Surely one of them should stay level-headed at a time?? What if the drinks are like "fall asleep" and "decide to run into the lava and die"]

[cavaliered]

[i like that you just ignored my last sentence entirely that's fine you'll never know now]

Eh. [what is self preservation.] If you want to be a wuss about it.

[toyska]

[WAIT NO I READ IT AND THEN FORGOT HELP!!!!]

This is going to get you in trouble one of these days. [Yeah on Wednesday when she and Itto have a Dice Maiden battle

Also wow somehow the space-time continuum warped and he is just now seeing her hood move? Weird must be a hell thing]

Don't tell me you got a pet too.

[cavaliered]

[SKDFKSK HELP

she makes a face at him at that first part. as for the second part, when he says that, a bony finger comes up out of the hood like a periscope.]

Not exactly. If you call him that he gets pissed.

[toyska]

[The fact that this happens before Itto and Harrow's top level is so funny

But, oh--hunh. He tilts his head slightly.]

What is he?

[cavaliered]

[a... bone hand crawls out of her hood, skittering to her shoulder like thing from the addams family.]

A bone hand. [okay, smartass] His name's Hex. I found him on Sunday.

[toyska]

[OKAY SMARTASS.

But, ah, that makes sense... her reward for cruelly sentencing her crush to Death By Chandra... Childe waves at it, while Mini Seelie, which had been vibing behind Childe as usual, vanishes with a pop.]

Does he do anything?

[cavaliered]

[yeah one of her friends died but she got this really cool bone hand so like, i guess that's fine.]

Nope. He's got opinions, and that's about it. [the bone hand flicks her in the neck, and she just dryly goes ow.]

[toyska]

[Sounds like an equal trade to him tbh

But he laughs, because he's weird. But also like, even if he wasn't already used to weird shit, all the skeletons on clown island would've desensitized him by now anyway]

I suppose if he starts to annoy you too much, you can always tie him to a stick and use him as a back scratcher, right? [Why was Childe nice to Bloody Mary's tarantula but he's bullying this hand]

[cavaliered]

[hex looks about as offended as a bone hand can be. he does the hand approximation of folding arms across his chest, which is just like. scrunching up, ig.]

I might actually do that. Watch your palm. [like watch your back get it lmao]

[toyska]

[HELP that makes him laugh]

I'd initially thought it was suspiciously generous of them to give us such nice rewards, but now it seems more likely that they're random.

[cavaliered]

I got my sword, but that was about the most useful thing I got - and I didn't even get it, Harrow did.

Granted, I haven't got much that I didn't bring with me to hell, but it seems like most of us are just getting things that follow us around, now.

[toyska]

[Wryly--]

Maybe we were all murdered on purpose so that they could open a menagerie down here.

[cavaliered]

[snorts.]

What a completely fucking inefficient way of doing it. [lol] Stupid thing is I could see it.

[she glances at the bar.]

Alright, which one?